Stop Pulling the Wagon

We see and are told in the news that we have a border crisis with tens of thousands of undocumented, would be immigrants flooding across our southern borders.  

On a serious note, I do not know anyone who is not moved by the sight of thousands of seemingly parent-less young children or ragged adults trying to escape poverty and even danger.  But, do we solve this by opening our borders to “all comers”?  Do we turn our Border Patrol agents into a kind of “Welcome Wagon”?  Do we just open all our borders on all sides to anyone and everyone from all countries around the world?  Can we just shut down the Department of Immigration and Naturalization?  

The Federal Government, State Governments and Congress are in a battle as to how to solve this crisis.  Some shouting to “Seal Our Borders” and others saying to welcome them all and create a “Path To Citizenship” for all comers whether legal applicants or those without papers.

I see a simple solution that should make everyone happy.  Lets send them where they are needed and wanted.

For example, Detroit, Michigan (pictured above) is a city that has lost tens (hundreds?) of thousands of citizens.  There are thousands of empty homes available either free or almost free for the taking.  And, Detroit has a long history of generous benefits to those in need.

Why not load these folks desiring to immigrate onto buses and take them to Detroit? On arrival they could be given a sack lunch and a map with directions (in their native language) to the offices of “Public Assistance” as well as street guides to areas where there is housing ready for the taking.

This program could be expanded to other cities that have by way of public pronouncements, ordinances and local laws indicated support for undocumented immigrants.  Some of the cities that come quickly to mind are San Francisco, New York, Chicago and Seattle but there are many others.

I have visions of caravans of buses with thousands of happy new, undocumented citizens streaming off the buses into the waiting arms of cities anxiously welcoming them with public funded programs to provide them with all the goods and services they need or want.

With my plan, the cities that have indicated they want them, get them and, get to pay for the services provided from their own local tax revenues.

Everybody wins.  What could possibly go wrong?

Bob Bandy

ONLY IN CALIFORNIA

Following are a couple of examples of California “Think” and planning.

Example #1:

Under a new California law the only judge of a persons sexual identity is the individual themselves and they can change that identity as often as they choose.

Under this new law, on any given day,  a hormonal 15 year old young man can decide that he is now a woman trapped in a mans body.  He may now go to his high school,  tell them that following this revelation he/she now wants to play on the girls basketball (softball, soccer, etc.) team and demand campus wide  access to the girls locker room, showers and restroom facilities.

Under this same law, signed by Governor Brown,  the schools must allow and accommodate this request.   What other impacted students and their parents  may feel about this is of no consideration.

I have no intent to offend those with true Gender identity issues but this law as written will cause considerably more unintended consequences than the writers of the law had the intelligence or common sense to foresee.  Our shortsighted Legislature and Governor at work.

Example #2:

Against voter objections, California is now on a path to install the first phase of a High Speed Rail System using some 9 Billion borrowed  State and Federal Dollars.  The first phase has begun and should be completed in 3-5 years depending on lawsuits,  strikes, environmental reports, delays, cost overruns etc.

Upon completion of this first phase,  rail passengers will be able to drive some 15 miles west of their small central valley town to a rail station built on government seized, former farmland in the middle of nowhere.   Here they can park their car and board the High Speed Train traveling at speeds up to 160 miles per hour for some 28 miles to another rail station located on government seized, former farmland in the middle of nowhere.   On arrival at destination station,  they can disembark the train and get into another vehicle (friend, family member, bus or cab) and drive some 15 miles east to another small central valley town which, by the the way, is some 28 highway miles from their original point of departure in the small central valley town.  Disneyland, eat your heart out.

For those who think this is just another waste of money,  Government boondoggle and/or labor union payoff, California residents are promised that at some vague distant future date their grand children, or great-grand children will be able to travel from Los Angeles to San Francisco in about 2 hours  on a completed High Speed Rail system that will only cost about 40 Gazillion Dollars to complete and take some 15 -40 years to build.  Ticket prices on the High Speed Rail System are hoped to be only a few hundred dollars each way.

 Did I mention that you can fly between San Francisco and Los Angeles in about an hour for around $100 on flights that leave every 30 minutes or so?

Completion of the whole High Speed Rail project is forecast by our governor for 2028 or so (fingers firmly crossed).

Of course, there may be a few delays.

Government negotiators are currently in meetings with Oprah Winfrey about running the future High Speed Train through the front yard of her Malibu mansion which just happens to lie on the only logical coastal route around the mountains between Bakersfield and the Los Angeles basin.

If those talks fail they will begin talks with the Sierra Club about  a sort of  Ski-Lift  operation (still in engineering design stages) to move the train over the mountains or, possibly, a forty mile tunnel through the mountains along the San Andreas Earthquake  fault line.

You can’t make this stuff up.

I would give more examples but enough food for thought for now.

Bob Bandy

Years ago I had a car that was ugly but wouldn’t die.  I finally put a bumper sticker on it that said “please steal this car”.   I am beginning to feel the same way about my identity.

I have always suspected, but we all now know as fact, that our government cannot be trusted at any level.

The IRS can and will target you for any reason they choose including, but not limited to, holding political views not shared by their labor union.  And, lets remember the IRS will be the chief enforcement arm for the “(un)Affordable Healthcare Act”, aka: Obamacare.  And, they get (taxpayer paid) bonus dollars for making our lives miserable.

The National Security Administration has the capability of monitoring virtually all forms of communication we use.  Cell phones,  email, web browsing, land line phones plus they claim they can observe our movements with the use of the millions of observation and security cameras everywhere.  They brag that they can determine not only where you are but often what you are doing.  Is that really just a “regular” mirror in those public bathrooms?

Its like living in a fish bowl.

I am working on a plan to become a 21st century “Invisible Man”.

A first step would be to duct tape my cell phone to the bottom of a Greyhound Bus departing for a Mexican Border city in Texas.  After doing that I would use only disposable cell phones purchased while in disguise under an assumed name at Walmart stores.

After that I have a question.  If someone steals my identity would that mean that the IRS, NSA, Justice Department and a whole host of other government agencies that take joy in making my life miserable would  now pursue the new “owner” of my identity and leave me alone?  Could I just claim to be an undocumented  person seeking a new life in America?

Maybe I could just let not one, but many, people steal my identity and really drive the “Feds” crazy.  Maybe I could form an identity exchange where like minded folks could trade identities every few months or weeks.

How about having an identity “Swap Party” where everyone comes in and puts their identity in a big fish bowl and at the end of the party they are blindfolded and pick out their new “identity” before leaving?

Hey, this could be fun.  Sort of like cluttering up a crime scene with several bucket loads of evidence leading investigators off on a hundred or more “rabbit trails”.

If called in for questioning I could just do what IRS Director Lois Lerner did and state that I have done nothing wrong and broken no laws but will take the Fifth Amendment and refuse to answer any questions.

It could even reach the point where even I no longer know who I am.  A truly Invisible Man.

Am I Bob Bandy?

WE ARE FROM THE GOVERNMENT AND WE ARE HERE TO HELP YOU!

What kind of problems are you having that your government can help you with?

Did you make a mistake and register to vote in the “wrong” political party?  Let our Auditors with the IRS show you ways to get those political donations routed to the “right” party so there won’t be any unpleasant questions about your tax returns.

Did you “accidentally” attend one of those Pro-Constitution” public rallies?  Let our folks with the Justice Department do a little “background” checking for you to make sure you are not getting in with the “wrong” crowd.  They will be happy to visit with your family, neighbors and friends.  Anything they turn up will be held in strict confidence and only shared with other helpful government agencies.

Do you own a business and “forgot” to make a contribution to the political party in power?  Your friends from the Environmental Protection Agency will be pleased to visit your place of business to help you comply with all 60,000 pages of Regulations.  Including all the sub-paragraphs and addendums which you are responsible to comply with.  (Helpful hint: You might want to keep your checkbook nearby.)

Having trouble keeping healthy or maybe have a Body Mass Index that does not comply with current government guidelines?  The Health & Human Services Department under the powers granted by the Affordable Care Act, and with the assistance of the Internal Revenue Service, will be glad to review your eating and drinking choices. They will have available all the helpful data provided by your credit card companies and those popular “Club” and “Member Rewards” cards from your favorite stores, restaurants and “other” places of “indulgence”.  And, they will be supported by the Justice Department.

Now there is that pesky First Amendment to the Constitution which prohibits Congress from making any laws which infringe upon your rights of Freedom of Speech and Freedom of the Press.

But, of course they won’t be making any such laws.

The Government doesn’t need them.  After all, they are only here to help you!

Bob Bandy

EVER WONDER WHAT HAS HAPPENED TO “YOUR” WORLD?

I have not written anything for a while.  In some ways I feel a little like Rip Van Winkle awakening from a long sleep wondering where I am and what has happened to the happy and ordered world I grew up in.

It seems to me that our lives are now ruled by a consortium of Clowns, Criminals and Lunatics.

A  journey through a looking glass into a world where the Lords of Darkness have stolen power and are creating a society where no good deed will go unpunished.

If the United States were the Milky Way Galaxy, then Washington D.C. would be the gravitational heart of that galaxy.

At the heart of  the Milky Way Galaxy there resides a Super-Massive Black Hole.  In space lingo a Black Hole is the collapsed heart of a large star that has compressed into a point where gravity is so intense that everything, including other stars and star stuff,  is sucked in and nothing of any recognized value, not even light, can escape.

Washington D.C. is like that.  A place where our tax dollars get sucked in and nothing of any value can possibly escape.

You know why?  Its because the Clowns, Criminals and Lunatics are busy stirring a big caulderon to turn our tax dollars into a system of Food  Stamps and Flat Screen TV’s to keep the masses complacent.

The Romans first introduced the concept of Bread and Circuses to keep the rabble quiet and content.  The Dark Lords in Washington have only copied them.

What?  Did you expect something creative and original to come out of Washington D.C. ?  Have you forgotten this is the place where 98% of our political leaders give the rest a bad name?

Bob Bandy

Feb. 2013

A KIND OF “WISH LIST”?

If I wanted to design the “perfect” place to live, and, if it did not matter how many folks I managed to infuriate and alienate in the process,  it would look something like this:

1. Government taxes at all levels could not exceed 10%.  I don’t think the government should ask for more than God does.  Everybody would pay the same rate of taxes.  The more you earn, the more you pay but the rate is the same.

2. Government would be forbidden budget deficits unless our nation faced invasion from a hostile foreign enemy.  At the time of this writing I cannot imagine a foreign government that would want to invade our country and assume our debt and problems.

3. All government services, except maybe national defense, would be put out to bid to private industry with specific performance requirements for payment and penalties for poor performance.  We might want to consider contracting out management of our national defense to Israel.

4. Those people and attorneys who file lawsuits and lose their case in court must pay the legal fees of the party they are suing.

5.  Convicted Felons:  First time offenders would spend their time in prison stateside in a cell watching and listening to endless re-runs of “Barney the Purple Dinosaur” (I love you, you love me etc.). Any time outside the cell would be in a physical labor environment (in pink jumpsuits).  Second time offenders would earn a trip to spend their time in a Mexican prison.  Three time losers would spend their prison terms in North Korea.  I am sure both Mexico and North Korea would be happy to provide the service at less than half what we taxpayers pay to maintain prisoners.  Surviving felons who commit a fourth offense will be parachuted into Taliban Country in Afghanistan armed with a Bible.

6. “Public” schools would be contracted and attendance based on parental choice of school.  Uniforms and discipline with specific requirements for advancement and graduation.  Students not compliant with specific disciplinary and learning requirements would be placed in alternative career/trade school or military “opportunity” environments.

7.  Those citizens with real, medically diagnosed, physical or mental illness would be provided basic needs which would include medical care.  Drug testing mandatory for all public assistance.

8. Both parents of a child are responsible for providing for the needs of the children they bring into the world.  Public assistance provided only with drug testing and mandatory work requirements.  No food stamp credit cards.  Food provided on the basis of basic dietary requirements.  Violation of the rules would terminate participation in any public program and removal of children to supervised foster care.  Parents who drop out of the program will receive mandatory parental training at the North Korean or Iranian  re-education camp of their choice.

9. All public officials must live under the same laws, regulations and programs (such as Social Security and Healthcare) that they impose on all other citizens.  No exceptions and no exemptions.

10. Public employees would work under specific work contracts with clearly defined and limited benefits including defined retirement (401k type) contribution plans.  No lifetime pension and health care benefits.

I think I will stop here as I have probably managed to anger and alienate enough people for one article.  Are those torches and pitchforks I see out in the street in front of my house?

Bob Bandy