Watching the Democratic Debate on February 25th between the seven qualifying candidates reminded me of the food fight scene with John Belushi in National Lampoons Animal House movie. (Universal Pictures 1978). The CBS moderators completely lost control as the candidates gesticulated and shouted over one another.

It left me, and I am sure many others, wandering what the future would look like with any one of this group in the White House?

But then, I got an idea.

Remember when the Democratic National Committee “robbed” Bernie Sanders of the Nomination in 2016 with a rule change/”Brokered” Convention and made Hillary Clinton, of “Whine & Book Tour” fame, the Democratic candidate for President?

Maybe they could do something similar with this bunch. Another Democratic National Committee rule change that would declare this group a single, but diverse political entity, sort of like a “Corporate” entity, that would be allowed to run, and if elected, serve as President on a Committee basis.

For example, Pete Buttigieg, who is often called Saint Pete, could be President on Sunday of each week. He could do his “whatever you want me to be today”, routine and wear his “What Me Worry?” face.

On Monday, Elizabeth Warren, the groups only person of color (she is 1/1024th Native American) will be President. With the stroke of her pen she can introduce her new math and implement her 2 cent tax on the wealth of the ultra rich to pay for a better economy for the rest of the country.

Tuesday, Joe Biden (who on alternate days is also running as a Senatorial Candidate) could be President if he can remember where he is for the day. He could remind us again of his victories like the time he “whupped” “Corn Pop”, the town bully who had threatened him with a piece of chain.

On Wednesday, Michael Bloomberg could emerge from his basement where he and Scrooge McDuck (who has signed a “Non-Disclosure Statement”) have been stacking and counting their gold coins and serve as our President for the day.

Thursday would be Amy Klobuchar’s day to regale us with endless reminders of her humble beginnings in the Midwest and how she has solved all the countries problems while working both sides of the aisle in Washington D.C.

Friday would give us President Tom Steyer, a Billionaire who made his fortune in the energy (Coal & Oil) business coming out and signing Presidential Executive Orders to save the planet by eliminating 90% of the coal and oil production jobs in the country so we can all sit in cold, dark rooms while enjoying a bowl of tofu and rutabaga stew.

Saturday would be President Bernie Sanders, dressed in his Presidential Santa Claus suit, serving as President and everything you ever wanted will be “Free – Free – Free”. Ninety Three Trillion Dollars worth. All paid for with paper dollars printed on his very own ATM machine which he has kept hidden behind door # 3.

It could all work. What could possibly go wrong?

Bob Bandy – March 2020

Post Script: I published this on March 1st and on March 2nd woke up to find two of these folks had dropped out. Oh well, a smaller committee as President maybe?

Schiff warns of Russian attack on US Mainland, as Day 2 of of Trump’s Senate impeachment trial concludes.

Above Quote Source: Fox News 1-22-20

Congressional Representative Adam Schiff is from California and is one of the House Managers in the Impeachment Trial of President Donald Trump.

Having followed him in the media for the last year or more I have found he has two most notable qualities. One is that he does not tell the truth and the second is that he lies – a lot.

With the Lemmings at CNN, MSNBC, ABC, CBS and NBC cheering him on, I watched as much as I could stomach of Adam Schiff’s performance on day two of the impeachment trial in the Senate.

Something began gnawing at my mind. He reminded me of someone, but who?

Finally, the light bulb flickered and then glowed brightly in my memory.

just for fun, rather than tell you who, I would like to present you with some clues and see if you can figure it out.

First Clue: Classic movie – 1954 – Columbia Pictures.

Second Clue: His last name started with a ‘Q’ and ended with a ‘G’.

Think raging paranoia and imagined crimes.

Hint: A missing quart of strawberries and a mysterious duplicate key.

Remember steel ball bearings being rolled about in a hand.

Picture a great actor in a superb performance.

Got it yet?

If you are anywhere near my age or have an interest in Classic Movies, this was too easy and you got it by about the second clue or by a peek at the lower picture. If you are a member of the later generations then you might need to check with an older friend, relative or maybe even a grandparent.

If you are still “stumped”, shoot me an email: Bob Bandy <sptw@sbcglobal.net>

Just for fun, a follow up trivia question: What was this characters full title and name in the movie? Hint: the correct answer words begin with the letters ‘C’ ‘P’ ‘F’ ‘Q’.

A fun quiz to share with your friends.

Bob Bandy – January 2020

Our current President is under Impeachment for putting conditions on payment of foreign aid to the Ukraine. This is the same Ukraine that has a long history of corruption. Guess he did not get the memo.

Like many members of Congress and the general public, I am shocked and dismayed. I had grown so comfortable in my expectation that United States Foreign Aid was just a rat hole for Taxpayer Dollars that was bottomless and non-accountable. And, pretty much the same under both Democratic and Republican Administrations.

I have accepted as fact that Foreign Aid and similar payments were distributed in a more traditional way, like the last Administration did: Put 1.3 Billion or more Dollars on pallets in cash, – cash is especially welcome when delivered with non-sequential serial numbered, unmarked bills – shrink wrapped to the pallet(s), decorated with a ribbon and delivered to the destination country – (like Iran’s – Tehran Airport) – in the middle of the night along with a gift card, no conditions and no expectation of reciprocal good will.

Well, we can always expect that the recipient Country will vote against us at the United Nations. That is historically the customary “Thank You” the U.S. has come to expect from the beneficiary’s of our generosity.

Another way that I have come to expect large amounts of Aid to be distributed happened in 1993 When Haiti was devastated by an Earthquake and some 13 Billion Dollars was pledged to help rebuild the country. Several Billion of those dollars was funneled – dare I say “Flushed” – through the Clinton Foundation for rebuilding housing and infrastructure. Little housing was built and the infrastructure remained in shambles but the money vanished. (search: Grifters: The Clinton Crime Family).

And, after all, we do have some historical context for aid to the Ukraine. The previous Administration gave them a Billion Dollars in Aid. We know it got there. Our former Vice Presidents son kept his job on the Governing Board of Ukraine’s largest Oil and Natural Gas Company. The money goes into the system. It gets “laundered”, it does the “Hokey Pokey”, the “right” people get paid and paid off. It’s just the way that Foreign Aid is supposed to work. Nothing wrong and nothing to see here!

One gets used to the idea that these unconditional Foreign Aid dollars will just end up in the pockets of Despots, Dictators, corrupt Contractors, Foreign Bureaucrats and other thieves. No questions asked and no accountability required.

An International “Comfort Zone” for our Taxpayer Dollars.

Guess I am an old fashioned guy, married to the tradition that accountability is not something Government is good at or wants to put into practice.

OR

Maybe, just maybe – should we put some kind of restrictions on our largess? Or – is that just crazy talk?

Bob Bandy – January 2020

As she continues her “World Whine & Book Tour” I am getting the feeling Hillary Clinton just might see a wedge of opportunity to join the fray in the Democratic Presidential Primary Race.

With Bernie Sanders and Joe Biden fading in the Polls, Elizabeth Warren scrambling from lie to lie about her ancestry, personal story and financing for her 96 Trillion Dollar “Make America Broke Again” plans for the Country, coupled with the remainder of the pack of candidates seeming unable to get traction in the race, maybe, just maybe she thinks the Democratic Party will come knocking at her door to take a third stab at the Presidency.

First things first – Get Bill into a WOKE Rehabilitation Center and 12 Step Program…….. um, make that a 24 Step Program.

Second, make sure the long Silk Scarf with FOB (Friends of Bill) embroidered on it and reportedly found in a corner of Jeffery Epstein’s Cell after his “suicide” strangulation, er… “hanging”, finds its way into the same Black Hole that her Email messages now reside in.

Next, she should freshen up her repertoire of excuses for losing her last two attempts at the Presidency. Just possibly, just maybe there is some small chance that she lost because of some failing on her own part. Or, is everything that goes awry always somebody else’s fault.

Psst…. just a thought, she might want to get a personal consultant with an eye to helping her look a little less like an angry Nurse Ratched when she appears in public. Only a kindly thought, just trying to help out.

Bob Bandy – October 2019

 

Seven plus years ago (Feb. 2012) I wrote a “spoof” article on this site titled: Mark of the Beast – The Club Card. It is still available on this site (use the search box) and I included it in my book “Boiling the Frog” – available on Amazon.com or order a signed copy direct from me for $10 (see right hand column), The point of the article was that these “Club Cards” and other methods of tracking our purchases are being advertised as ways to “Serve Us Better” but are really only vehicles to monitor our lives for the sellers purposes and potentially for the government to control what we can buy, sell or consume. All, of course, “for our own good” because they, the government, know best how to manage our lives. “Scared yet?”

Now I see on television that Insurance Company’s are “offering” an “App” to monitor your driving habits in order to offer discounts on your car insurance if you drive the way they have decided you should. This, and similar “Apps” can also track your movements, i.e., where you go, What you do, how long you stay and other morsels of personal data to be harvested by Google, Facebook and other entities.

Goodbye, private get-a-way weekend with your loved one. Your Cell Phone companion is a “tattle-tale” to all those companies and Government Agencies who want to monitor your life. “Scared yet?”

Facebook is offering a handy “Portal” to install in your home so that you can always be “on camera” for whoever has access to your “Portal” “on the other end”. Family, Friends, Facebook, IRS etc. Can you spell “hacked”? I am thinking of ordering one of these “Portal’s”, putting it in our house, then hanging a picture of a horses butt in front of the lens just for fun.

Google (and others) have “Algorithms” – no this is not a “hot” Latin Dance – that can monitor and predict your nearly every move, voting habits, purchases, favorite foods, character flaws, weaknesses etc. etc. Now, are you scared?

Our day to day world is filled with cameras, everywhere you go and no matter what you are doing. More and more of these cameras have “Facial Recognition” software. Not to mention listening devices and “other ways” to track our every activity.

We live in a fish bowl.

Hmmmmm! On the other hand, maybe this could present us with an opportunity to have a little fun? Want to trade “Apps”, identity and habits for a while?

Since the “Apps” and tracking often seem to depend on our Cell Phones, perhaps we could do something creative with said phones. Like using “disposable” phones purchased at Walmart while in disguise, using them for a short time and then slipping them into the pocket of non-English speaking tourists at the airport or duct tape them inconspicuously to a local commuter bus. That could keep the Fed’s busy for a while. Lots of possibilities!

Bob Bandy – September 2019

 

Recently while watching a documentary on prisons and prisoners, I saw a prisoner with “MOMMA TRIED” tattooed across his chest.

It got me to thinking. And, no I am not talking about the unfortunate homeless living on the streets.

I am talking about the City Administrators of these cities, like San Francisco, Los Angeles, Seattle, Portland and, yes, sadly Sacramento and too many others.

Yesterday, I heard on the news that San Francisco was going to provide elevator operators in buildings because the “homeless” have been using elevators as public toilets.

I am ashamed to admit that in a moment of anger I would like to take these so-called “Administrators” and “Guardians” of their citizenry, and have “MOMMA TRIED” tattooed across their foreheads.

Their first duty is to provide the citizens of their city with safety in a clean, healthy environment – not hold meetings and talk about grandiose plans which will cost a gazillion more taxpayer dollars and in the end not produce the desired result. I have heard on the news that the State of Washington has spent a Billion (with a “B”) Dollars on homeless plans and the situation on the streets of Seattle are, if anything, worse.

Here is a two step plan to clean the streets:

First, provide Charter Buses to relocate these poor, miserable people living in filth and degradation to new, clean and prosperous locales. May I suggest places like Marin County (home of Nancy Pelosi), Malibu, Brentwood, Beverly Hills, Hollywood and other places filled with those smart, politically connected folks who believe they have all the answers for all problems. Be sure they arrive with a nice box lunch, map of the area of their new “home” and a crisp new $100 bill.

Second, using scrapers, loaders and dump trucks, remove the debris and trash from the streets. Then Fire Hose the remaining human waste and filth into a containment location (similar to the ones required on construction sites) and have it “sucked” up and disposed of in a sanitation facility. Preferably one in Marin County etc..

After completing these steps put up signs (in multiple languages) that henceforth the streets will be water-blasted on a regular basis for public health and safety reasons on an unannounced basis as needed. Then do it.

Problem solved at far less cost than all those “solutions” provided by those “Administrator” meetings.

Sorry about the “MOMMA TRIED” tattoo crack. Most of those Administrators foreheads are probably too narrow for it anyway.

Bob Bandy – August 2019